Warning: Girl Power Ahead

If you do not like listening to girl power music, talking about happiness, or reading a bit of snark, then I suggest you stop reading now.  Usually when I feel sad, I end up eating a ton of crap...then feel even worse.  This morning I woke up and immediately made my new go-to breakfast without giving myself a chance to sabotage the day.  Today, I decided that I've come so far already that I'm simply not going back.

That being said, I feel like absolute shit today.  Like a damp New York City Jewish mess.  I'm sure it's the combination of the weather and many other things, but on this rainy Friday I need a little pick me up.  I've already had a large coffee with soy milk from my favorite coffee shop and changed my clothes twice (I got caught in a downpour after my morning meeting) so the only thing I can think of that could make this day better would be the perfect girl power jam.

So this song has got my jamming around this great metropolis and saved many a tear today.  I hope it puts a little pep in your step.

Happy Friday!

What Dreams...and Crushes Are Made Of

Yesterday I hinted at a new crush I had brewing.  Obviously, this drew inquiries from many of my close friends who are also blog readers.  You may think that now I'll reveal this lucky fellas identity.  Well, you would be wrong.  Every relationship needs to have a little mystery to keep things exciting, no?

For now this crush will be all mine.  And I like it that way.

In other news, I had a very scary dream last night.  My sister was getting married (that's not the scary part, I promise) and I was the Maid of Honor, which means I felt very special and important.  Apparently, the dress I was supposed to wear was shiny and silver and awful and as soon as my Mother saw me wearing it she cried and said it looked terrible.  Then while I was walking down the aisle it began to flood and I slipped and fell and was basically standing in front of 300 people (my sister knows people, OK?) wearing a wet nighty.  Then I woke up gasping for breath.

Foreshadowing, right?

Oh and I'm continuing with my tucking shirts in phase this week.  It's more motivation for me to not stuff my face.  So what if I look like a 90's sitcom star...I hear that look is coming back in a big way.  If you see me wearing a cropped baby T, then we'll talk.

Big Smiles

I lost 4.4 pounds this past week! So far WW has been wonderful so now it's time to step up my fitness game. Slow and steady wins the race.

I'm so skinny when I turn sideways I simply disappear. I think I'm too excited to sleep.

Wednesday Happenings...

A few things have been going on around these parts this week:

1.  I went to my first Rangers game last night.  It was awesome!  (Thank you Allie!).
2.  I'm planning a nice little warm weather get away.  More details to follow, I'm sure.
3.  I've been wearing my shirts tucked in for the first time in two years.
4.  I'm actually excited to weigh-in tonight (a day late due to the aformentioned NHL game).  I want to know that my hard work is paying off.  Let's hope it is.
5.  Remember a couple of years ago I posted a "before" photo of myself in a bikini as motivation?  Yeah, I can't believe I did that either.  Even worse, I'm considering reposting it so I have something to work towards.  Good or bad idea?
6.  I have a new crush.  I think it's getting serious.

In even more exciting news...I have a new Ask A Dude contributor joining the team.  So, please email me with some juicy questions and we'll get the ball rolling again!!!

Happy Hump Day!

P.S.  Tom Green was at the Rangers game last night.  I used to watch his show in hysterics.

The Grind...

Happy misty, gray Monday blog friends!  I hope everyone had a fantastic weekend.  I was super low-key this weekend, which was great for a girl just getting into the WW grind.  I am happy to report that I have tracked everything that has gone into my mouth!  In fact, right now I'm enjoying a late lunch of carrot ginger soup and coffee.  I have my weigh-in tomorrow so cross your fingers that some padding has fallen off my tush, if you know what I mean.

Over the weekend I started thinking about what's happened in 2012 so far.  I began this year in a far better place than 2011.  I remind myself of that every morning when I hit snooze for the fifth time.  Oh yes, I'm a compulsive snoozer, which leads to compulsive rushing, resulting in compulsive sweating.  It's a vicious cycle.  But, I digress.  I feel like I am taking real control over my life.  I was joking with one of my best girlfriends last night about starting Project True Love 2012 and coupling it with Project Skinny 2012.  That may sound like Project Overwhelmed 2012, but I'm hoping it's more like Project Healthy and In Love 2012.  A girl can dream, right?

One of my greatest regrets in 2011 was letting loneliness take the drivers seat.  I made decisions and accepted invitations in an attempt to ward off the underlying loneliness I was experiencing.  The most important decision I made so far this year was to stop "taking what I can get" and setting my standards higher.  Every relationship, platonic or romantic, is an opportunity to do better; be better.  In the past month, I have felt more like myself than I have in a couple of years.  I don't believe in coincidences, so this was no accident.  It was a decision I made to be happier.  And it's not easy.  Some days I feel awful.  I feel like maybe it would be better to accept the half-assed relationships than to surround myself with fewer people.  Other days, I feel like an effing rock star and show up wearing red and, gasp, leopard together!  This post has gotten ranty and a bit weird, but what I'm trying to say is that I hate New Years Resolutions, so I decided to make a few "projects" for myself this year.

I think my point is that saying NO to things that don't serve my overall goals is hard.  Really, really hard.  I'm an instant gratification gal and patience is a virtue I don't possess, therefore trusting that what I want is on it's way has been a challenge.  A challenge I've chosen to welcome in 2012.  As some of my favorite "gurus" have said, If not now, when?

That Funny Feeling...

...when you realize you're favorite coffee shop is out of soup, salads, and yogurt and you realize you're about to order a bagel and you completely start sweating and freak out because you're on WW.  Then, you look up the points values of a whole wheat bagel and light cream cheese and find it fits quite nicely into your points today and breath a sigh of relief.  There is no "good" or "bad."  I just have to keep tracking and tracking and eating more veggies and tracking some more.  Sweet lord, this is not easy.

In happier news, it's Friday!  I plan on having a totally crazy Friday night, also known as a movie on my couch.  Hope you guys have a lovely weekend!

Confessions of a Sneaky Eater...

One of my best girlfriends and I were discussing my joining WW over dinner the other night and I got to thinking about how I got to this weight in the first place.  I had one "skinny" year in our almost a decade old friendship.  Mind you "skinny" for me was still more than she probably weighs and she stands a tall 5"4'.  I was lamenting over being at my "heavy" weight again and she asked if I was heavier now than the first time I joined.  She was just innocently inquiring because she never remembered my being particularly heavy in college.  Oh, I just love her for that.  But, truth be told, I was about four pounds lighter in the Spring of 2005 when I joined.  I threw out my old WW booklets a couple of years ago because they made me depressed.  I digress.
I started writing this post because I was reading Stephanie Klein's WW posts looking for some inspiration.  I happened to stumble upon this gem:

I ate an entire box of truffles (That would be sixteen balls in two sittings). In my car. Equal parts animal and daytime television for women. Worse, the next day I hit up the Halloween candy and hid the wrappers, pushing them under a carton of eggs in our garbage. Move over Skinny Bitch; make room for Sneaky Psycho. I had to do something.

I bet you can see where I'm going with this.  I too have buried wrappers under other packages in the garbage.  I've done this in my own apartment (for absolutely no reason), at my parents, at a boys apartment, when I lived with my sorority, while visiting a friend's apartment, basically anywhere I've been.  Ugh, I hate talking about this stuff.  I find it whiny and depressing.  Yet, I feel like it's part of my journey.  I have to share it.  I have to get rid of it.  So, now I log what goes into my big mouth on my iPhone like a lady.  If you have the pleasure of dining with me in the next several months I'm sure you'll be a witness.  I don't know what made me decide to take WW seriously this time.  It might have had something to do with a picture I saw of myself in Cabo.  It's a definite possibility.  It may be the fact that I basically live in leggings and the two pairs of jeans that fit me.  Or it could be the dread I felt every single morning in Cabo.  Great, it's bathing suit time again.  

Thus concludes today's confession.  Oh and since this post is all about "change,"  I think you'll enjoy the song of the day.