I don’t know what is worse, wanting someone you can’t have or having someone you don’t want? Do you even know what you want? Most of the time I’m not so sure. I know one thing for sure, one of worst “wants” is not wanting someone, but not wanting anyone else to have them. Been there, wanted that. It’s ludicrous to think we have such power over other people’s lives, but it’s nice to dream sometimes, isn’t it? Think about the last object/person you truly wanted. What steps did you take to make this want yours? If you’re like me, the answer is probably very few.
Sometimes the idea of a person is far better than the actual person. Just as John Mayer says, “is it me or the idea of me?” Well, is it? I’m guilty of having saintly memories of people who are far from saints. I like to call this phenomenon “breakup amnesia,” but it can apply to platonic friendships as well. Last night I was tossing and turning listening Chelsea Handler’s hilarious banter with her friends and I had a thought. It was a hard pill to swallow, but I finally got it down. I always thought there must be a reason I still wanted to be in certain people’s lives when others did not. I thought the Universe has a greater purpose for all of this, maybe we have a special connection that will bond us even after all these years. In reality, maybe the other people just wised up sooner. As I’ve said more times than I’d care to admit, you end up with what you put up with. In any relationship, however casual it may be, everyone has a breaking point; a point after which nothing will ever been the same. It seems I have reached mine. I let the idea that someone else's wants were more important than mine. In the end, I just want someone who wants me…and wants what I want.
Today’s song is a fun romp in the sack of wants. It’s just what the doctor ordered.
Rock on, my friends.