Last night I found myself thinking way too late into the night about feeling "special." Someone once told me that the problem with Americans was that we were all taught from a young age that we were "special" or "talented" when in reality most people are just average. Average in the most general sense of the word. Everyone is good at something, but not everyone is great at something. This theory used to really irritate me. Such a pessimist, I would say. Now as I find myself creeping towards thirty I have started to see his point. Everyone thinks that they are the exception to the rule. It's the reason why romantic comedies exist and shows like SATC were so groundbreaking. HBO was finally telling the "truth" (as truthful as TV can be) about love and relationships. Well, until the finale and subsequent movies at least.
I swear I have a point. Every woman living in New York City was walking around thinking they were Carrie Bradshaw. A writer who could afford all those shoes. I digress. I truly believe that everyone has a talent, however obscure it may be. My talent is sarcasm. I kid. It's more snark. All anyone wants is to be the one that is chosen; the one who makes someone realize what an asshole they've been. Personally, I have put myself in situations under the premise of "he's so different with me." HA. How about the previous women who thought that? Maybe that realized sooner than I, but they were out of there when they didn't get what they wanted. I will never make that mistake again. You do not want to be the girl that he learns how to behave with. You want to be the one after that. Trust me.
You want to be the one who doesn't have to explain the most basic social norms, such as sending flowers or bringing wine. You want to be the one he instinctively calls after a long drive; the one made to feel special on your birthday. And the best part is, you deserve that. We all do. There is something sexy and mysterious about someone who will always be slightly out of reach. The thing we all forget is, your arms will get tired after a while. They will want a rest.
So here's my unsolicited advice: take a rest. If someone isn't giving you want you want/need now, don't assume they eventually will. For once, assume the worst. They are not the person for you. The person for you will do those things without being prompted. That person is on his/her way, you just need to push the current jerk out of the way.